Hi everyone, just woke up after the long fly back home. I just wanted to clarify something, for those of you that haven’t read my blog from the beginning, I have been going to Cancer Treatment Centers of America since last May. I would trust no one else on this planet with my cancer treatments. They are the best…period.
There was a time I was considering doing chemo here locally I could not find an Oncologist here that would follow the DX from CTCA. The 2 Oncs that I saw here both insisted that I should be on Avastin, well when I got to CTCA I had asked my Oncologist Dr. Pisick about Avastin and why he hasn’t tried it. He explained to me that when I arrived in May my cancer had mutated so far along that the pathologist was unable to tell which subtype of NSCLC I had, it could be either squamous cell or adenocarcinoma. They could not tell which, they leaned toward squamous cell. Dr. Pisick informed me that the reason he did not use Avastin is because if my sub type was adenocarcinoma it would have made my lungs bleed and most likely I would have died in about 3-4 months.
Unbelievable, I can’t fathom that Dr.s can be so adamant about trying new drugs on people with no research, no background, just insistence because they think they are right. And they are willing to put your life on the line to find out. That is why I trust only CTCA, Cancer is ALL that they do, and they do it ALL kinds of ways. If your not there you need to get there. THEY ARE THE BEST CANCER FIGHTERS ON THE PLANET! Anyway enough from me for now, day 2 of chemo next post. love you all!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Back in The Saddle
Well first thing I found out when getting to Chicago was when you have lung cancer breathing dry frozen 4 degree air is hard at best. I had several coughing fits when outside (what fun). Anyway, had my CT and PET scans yesterday, had my team meetings today. Team meetings are when you discuss the results of your scans with your Dr., Naturopathist, Nutritionist, and Care Management.
So, yes my cancer has grown, however, it has not grown past the point when I was diagnosed back last May. So, when I went to the hospital they didn’t have anything to compare they’re CT scan with so they saw what they thought to be out of control cancer.
I can’t say how relieved I am to have had the chance to talk to MY oncologist at CTCA. He explained everything in detail. I am back to my old funny self, I have such a piece of mind (ahhhhh). Ok real quick, he has me back on infused chemo (Alimta), every 3 weeks, indefinitely. We will do scans after the 4th cycle. So tomorrow we fly back home, have to get up very early, so I’ll add more later.
God Bless and love to you all!
So, yes my cancer has grown, however, it has not grown past the point when I was diagnosed back last May. So, when I went to the hospital they didn’t have anything to compare they’re CT scan with so they saw what they thought to be out of control cancer.
I can’t say how relieved I am to have had the chance to talk to MY oncologist at CTCA. He explained everything in detail. I am back to my old funny self, I have such a piece of mind (ahhhhh). Ok real quick, he has me back on infused chemo (Alimta), every 3 weeks, indefinitely. We will do scans after the 4th cycle. So tomorrow we fly back home, have to get up very early, so I’ll add more later.
God Bless and love to you all!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
When It Rains It Pours
Had a visit to the hospital today, unscheduled. The last 2 weeks I’ve been coughing, and its been getting steadily worse. So believing I was being hit with another round of pneumonia I went to the ER. My complaint was shortness of breath, a little chest and back pain, and this cough. Well the Dr. came in, talked to me about my condition, my status with cancer and suggested I do a chest x ray. After she saw the X ray she came and suggested that I do a CT scan. This I knew was not good news. After reading the CT she let me know that my cancer has spread through my lungs more so than the CT scan I had 6 weeks ago. Fortunately for me I am scheduled to go to CTCA this Monday. It was a bit disconcerting but I’m hoping I can still kick this cancer in the butt with a bit of help. I’ll drop more news next week. Oh the temp in Chicago will be 4 degrees =p Can’t wait!
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
A New Twist
Well I won’t lie to anyone here. I’ve decided to get a “Medical Marijuana” license and try “legal weed” to help fight my cancer. Sounds wacky eh? Well I’m a pothead of younger days, and I’ve tried to stay up on cannabis medicinally and the help it can do for whatever ails you. “Run from the cure” was very interesting video I just recently watched about a man named Richard Simpson who grows marijuana and pulls the “THC” from the plant. The form is an oil that he gives to several people with “cancer”. According to him and the other people (including a Canadian Police Officer who was fired) they were “cured” no trace, no tumors, nodda cancer. He claims no one will listen to him and you know what I believe him. After all pharmaceutical companies would not want that word out would they? I have St4 Lung cancer, I figure I have nothing to lose by trying it and my life to gain. So i got my license, I went to a dispensary got some oils, weed, and “edibles”. I’m almost tempted to go to Canada and find this man, he says he will give the oil to anyone who wants it “free”. So you ask how am I taking it? Vaporization, its similar to smoking but the flame doesn’t touch the plant so there is no smoke. Plus the edibles aren’t to bad, you have to like the taste of bud though. Dad if you read this please, you once told me the reason you didn’t smoke pot was because it was illegal, well for me its not illegal anymore, and for anyone else in California and a few other states. I can tell you this for sure, since I started vaporizing, my vicodin intake has been cut in half, I hope to stop the vicodin entirely by next week. Food for Thought God Bless
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Long Days Longer Nights
Well it’s been an interesting few days and nights. My sleep pattern is just out the window atm. I take a sleeping pill called Zolpidem (Amblien), in fact I break the pill in half its so good. The thing is when I’m on this dam computer I lose track of time easily. I look at the clock it says 8:00. (You want to take this pill before say 10pm) Then I look at the clock its like 12:30! Argh! If I take the pill then I won’t wake up for like 12 hours and then when I do it takes almost an hour for me to become conscious. So I don’t take it and then I don’t sleep =/. So I wind up literally passing out from exhaustion like at 6:30 in the morning. Thank God my wife is coming back home (she has had to stay away because she caught the flu) She keeps me and my meds on the straight and narrow =) I don’t know what I would do without her! Still taking the 500mg horse pills of Levaquin, still hear a crackling in my lung when i breath in deep and slow =(. I’m hoping that changes soon or it could mean another stay at the hospital. Sorry I haven’t been leaving any witty comments lately been kind of tired. Hope everyone has a great week!
PS: Did want to rant about one thing. California approved medical marijuana a couple years back, this last election Prop 19 would have legalized it. I was going to vote no, but when the U.S. Atty. Gen. Eric H. Holder Jr. sought to disabuse California residents of the notion last week. “We will vigorously enforce the Controlled Substances Act against those individuals and organizations that possess, manufacture or distribute marijuana for recreational use, even if such activities are permitted under state law,” It dawned on me. WHAT THE PEOPLE WANT NO LONGER MATTERS, WE NOW ARE BEING TOLD BY THE GOVERNMENT WHATS GOOD FOR US AND WHATS NOT…This is no longer a democracy.
Prop 19 did not pass, but it shows that the government no longer is “For the people, by the people”, the government is now “Telling YOU People”.
For the people that voted against Prop 19, Don’t bitch about the BILLIONS of tax dollars wasted on busting people smoking pot, don’t bitch about the drug dealers in your neighborhoods selling it to your kids, you had a chance to make a change and instead you let the government “TELL” you whats good for you. How long before they “TELL” you your life isn’t worth saving because you have ST4 cancer? That there is someone younger that needs it more than you?
I’m all for helping out the poor, but I grew up in Jersey City watching the PIMPS with 25 kids cash their welfare checks at the bank every Wednesday, while my Dad busted his ass working as a fireman getting paid less than the garbage collectors, working 2 other jobs and paying TAXES.
I’m sorry there I go ranting off about politics, it just pains me to see whats become of our America. It’s now “Theirs”. God Bless.
PS: Did want to rant about one thing. California approved medical marijuana a couple years back, this last election Prop 19 would have legalized it. I was going to vote no, but when the U.S. Atty. Gen. Eric H. Holder Jr. sought to disabuse California residents of the notion last week. “We will vigorously enforce the Controlled Substances Act against those individuals and organizations that possess, manufacture or distribute marijuana for recreational use, even if such activities are permitted under state law,” It dawned on me. WHAT THE PEOPLE WANT NO LONGER MATTERS, WE NOW ARE BEING TOLD BY THE GOVERNMENT WHATS GOOD FOR US AND WHATS NOT…This is no longer a democracy.
Prop 19 did not pass, but it shows that the government no longer is “For the people, by the people”, the government is now “Telling YOU People”.
For the people that voted against Prop 19, Don’t bitch about the BILLIONS of tax dollars wasted on busting people smoking pot, don’t bitch about the drug dealers in your neighborhoods selling it to your kids, you had a chance to make a change and instead you let the government “TELL” you whats good for you. How long before they “TELL” you your life isn’t worth saving because you have ST4 cancer? That there is someone younger that needs it more than you?
I’m all for helping out the poor, but I grew up in Jersey City watching the PIMPS with 25 kids cash their welfare checks at the bank every Wednesday, while my Dad busted his ass working as a fireman getting paid less than the garbage collectors, working 2 other jobs and paying TAXES.
I’m sorry there I go ranting off about politics, it just pains me to see whats become of our America. It’s now “Theirs”. God Bless.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
CANCER IS NOT A DEATH SENTENCE!
No I’m not sorry about the caps. What I am sorry about is the fact that there are STILL Dr.s out there telling people they are going to die, and giving them deadlines. Hey Dr. LEE in Temecula, Ca. remember me? According to you I was to die yesterday. That’s right 6 months that’s what you gave me, remember? I do! I bet you not only don’t remember but I bet you also told that to several other poor slobs. People with cancer don’t deserve this kind of treatment from Dr.s! The Hippocratic Oath is an oath historically taken by doctors swearing to practice medicine ethically. What is ethical about giving someone a death sentence??? jaimie03 asked for help, please advise her, she’s scared for her Mother because some lame Dr. gave her Mom a death sentence!
Cancer is not a Death Sentence, even if your at ST4, I am living testament to that! No thanks to Dr. LEE.
God Bless
Cancer is not a Death Sentence, even if your at ST4, I am living testament to that! No thanks to Dr. LEE.
God Bless
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Ignorance shows it ugly face
Susan Williams Tucker "I'm so against this "sucks" trend regarding cancer. Having cancer is bad enough. Being associated with trash talk is not appreciated! There has to be a better way to express things."
Susan Williams Tucker "No matter how much fun it is to "vent" - it doesn't elevate you or our fight against cancer by sounding like a low class idiot. Would you wear a tee shirt stating "I be aginst that daggum friggin cancer sheeeett". Same thing. Let's at least have some dignity."
This is an example of why the United States of America is going to hell in a hand basket. Because people like this can't keep their opinion about something that has nothing to do with them to themselves. And then when they do make an unasked for opinion, its obvious its made in judgmental ignorance. Susan you should be ashamed of yourself, you came onto our blog and accused us of having "fun" venting. every person on Blogforacure.com has cancer, or loves someone who has it. How dare you come to our blog and make accusations. Do the rest of the country a favor, stay in VENICE, Florida we have no use for your ignorance. May God forgive you.
Susan Williams Tucker "No matter how much fun it is to "vent" - it doesn't elevate you or our fight against cancer by sounding like a low class idiot. Would you wear a tee shirt stating "I be aginst that daggum friggin cancer sheeeett". Same thing. Let's at least have some dignity."
This is an example of why the United States of America is going to hell in a hand basket. Because people like this can't keep their opinion about something that has nothing to do with them to themselves. And then when they do make an unasked for opinion, its obvious its made in judgmental ignorance. Susan you should be ashamed of yourself, you came onto our blog and accused us of having "fun" venting. every person on Blogforacure.com has cancer, or loves someone who has it. How dare you come to our blog and make accusations. Do the rest of the country a favor, stay in VENICE, Florida we have no use for your ignorance. May God forgive you.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Mondays Officially Suck
What is it about Mondays? I seem to lose it emotionally every Monday. I either get a why am I doing this, or why should I keep fighting this, or wouldn’t it be easier to just say I quit. Sometimes I get mad, I go nutty on my family, I lose it and take it out on someone I love, or I just start screaming at no one in particular, sometimes I’ll even pick a fight with someone I don’t even know because I get this attitude about screw it I’m dying anyway, what the hell are they going to do to hurt me? Sometimes I think about robbing a bank to solve my financial problems, hell what are they going to do throw me in jail? Sometimes I think about finding all the people that hurt me in my life or used me or hurt my family and going back and making them pay. I hear all the time on the news how people do it and get away with it, why not me, why isn’t my turn now after all I’m dying anyway right?
I only think like this on Mondays, so for me Mondays suck, will always suck. Tomorrow I’ll be fine, back to my old loving, fighting this dam disease self. Mondays make me feel lonely, make me feel sad. Mondays always bring you back to reality, Mondays suck.
God Bless Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, and God please do something about Mondays, they suck.
I only think like this on Mondays, so for me Mondays suck, will always suck. Tomorrow I’ll be fine, back to my old loving, fighting this dam disease self. Mondays make me feel lonely, make me feel sad. Mondays always bring you back to reality, Mondays suck.
God Bless Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, and God please do something about Mondays, they suck.
To long
Ow! Its been a month gone by and I haven't updated. Oops. Well the last big update I had on my other blog is that they have taken me off of infused chemotherapy. Instead now they are trying a pill on me called Tarceva. Its a very expensive pill ($4500.00 per pill), it is said to be great for controlling cancer cells. It does however have some nasty side effects, worst of which for me has been an acne like rash. I hate rashes, I would rather take a shot in the foot than have a rash. So right now because the rash has gotten so bad for me I have had to stop taking the pill for 7 days to give my body a chance to recover. Plus I am also taking a couple more meds to counter the rash. Wednesday will be the day I call the Dr. back to find out where we go from here.
Overall I feel good, I have been able to do some light work around my property. My lungs are definitely stronger than 6 months ago. I have even started bugging my boss about letting me return to work. (Doubtful that will happen). On BFAC (Blogforacure.com) there has been alot of ranting about this "pink" breast cancer awareness month. How they seem to have commercialized it and taken the real meaning away from it. Also some serious talk about how our wonderful FDA (Fuddy Duddys Association) has prevented, stepped in the way of, and screwed up some real steps toward better drugs for cancer. If someone is reading this please go check it out. Anyway, I got a new laptop, kind of a beefy one a Toshiba Qosmio, I love it ( it weighs a ton) but it keeps me in great shape lol. I am currently trying to find a wheel carry on type bag that can hold it. Well enough ranting for one post, take care blog I'll be back =0
Overall I feel good, I have been able to do some light work around my property. My lungs are definitely stronger than 6 months ago. I have even started bugging my boss about letting me return to work. (Doubtful that will happen). On BFAC (Blogforacure.com) there has been alot of ranting about this "pink" breast cancer awareness month. How they seem to have commercialized it and taken the real meaning away from it. Also some serious talk about how our wonderful FDA (Fuddy Duddys Association) has prevented, stepped in the way of, and screwed up some real steps toward better drugs for cancer. If someone is reading this please go check it out. Anyway, I got a new laptop, kind of a beefy one a Toshiba Qosmio, I love it ( it weighs a ton) but it keeps me in great shape lol. I am currently trying to find a wheel carry on type bag that can hold it. Well enough ranting for one post, take care blog I'll be back =0
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Maintaining Composure
Hi all, today has been a hectic one to say the least. In the past few visits to CTCA I had mentioned that I was thinking about looking into getting chemo locally rather than fly to Zion every 3 weeks. I still wanted to do my scans in Zion, I still wanted my Dr. in Zion to run the show. Today somehow though it all got discombobulated. The Care Management at CTCA misunderstood, canceled all my future appointments, all my prescriptions and all my ties with CTCA including my Dr. OUCH! Man was that turmoil to unravel! However Nikki was able to get everything back on track.
Also today I called OPM about my "Living Trust". Its been 5 weeks, all the proper papers were sent through the right channels we are expecting a check any day now. (OPM Is Office of Personnel Management, I am an ex federal employee). The life insurance people are telling us they don't know what the hold up is that we should call OPM. So I call OPM and wind up talking with an egotistical person named Chuck, seems that Chuck can't get off his ass and go track down my "file". I quote, "When the file is on my desk I'll certify it." despite Chuck's lovely attitude I'm very sincere and calm, I tell him the financial situation I am in, I tell him that the life insurance people told me the process typically takes 2-3 weeks and that they suggested I call.
Chuck goes off on some tangent about how "they" are contracted, they have no idea what goes on in his office, blah blah wah wah. Then he tells me well "NOW" it may take as long as 6 months to process this.
Thank God I am a fair even minded person. I would think if I were say, some marine or army soldier or ex police officer, I would probably go find and do something unpleasant to Chuck. Now I understand why people these days absolutely hate government. It makes me ashamed that I was once one of them, not a Chuck mind you but still it bothers me. My livelihood is in the hands of some egotistical maniac in Pennsylvania. Isn't that reassuring? So tomorrow my wife and I have to spend the day trying to find someone other than "Chuck" to help us.
I noticed that in my last post a few people mentioned that they live in Canada and they are so happy they have socialized medicine. I can't even begin to fathom the problems that would arise if the US government gets control of health care in this country. I mean look what they have done with everything else! Sigh, I brought politics into my blog ugh.
I just hope that somewhere down the line middle class America wakes up and puts corporate America and "it's" government in "it's" place before its to late. I mean people like "Chuck" are going to be deciding whether or not you get chemo treatments, and what Doctors you can see, and when you can see them and what prescriptions you can take. God help us all.
God Bless all cancer fighters, survivors, caretakers and their families.
Also today I called OPM about my "Living Trust". Its been 5 weeks, all the proper papers were sent through the right channels we are expecting a check any day now. (OPM Is Office of Personnel Management, I am an ex federal employee). The life insurance people are telling us they don't know what the hold up is that we should call OPM. So I call OPM and wind up talking with an egotistical person named Chuck, seems that Chuck can't get off his ass and go track down my "file". I quote, "When the file is on my desk I'll certify it." despite Chuck's lovely attitude I'm very sincere and calm, I tell him the financial situation I am in, I tell him that the life insurance people told me the process typically takes 2-3 weeks and that they suggested I call.
Chuck goes off on some tangent about how "they" are contracted, they have no idea what goes on in his office, blah blah wah wah. Then he tells me well "NOW" it may take as long as 6 months to process this.
Thank God I am a fair even minded person. I would think if I were say, some marine or army soldier or ex police officer, I would probably go find and do something unpleasant to Chuck. Now I understand why people these days absolutely hate government. It makes me ashamed that I was once one of them, not a Chuck mind you but still it bothers me. My livelihood is in the hands of some egotistical maniac in Pennsylvania. Isn't that reassuring? So tomorrow my wife and I have to spend the day trying to find someone other than "Chuck" to help us.
I noticed that in my last post a few people mentioned that they live in Canada and they are so happy they have socialized medicine. I can't even begin to fathom the problems that would arise if the US government gets control of health care in this country. I mean look what they have done with everything else! Sigh, I brought politics into my blog ugh.
I just hope that somewhere down the line middle class America wakes up and puts corporate America and "it's" government in "it's" place before its to late. I mean people like "Chuck" are going to be deciding whether or not you get chemo treatments, and what Doctors you can see, and when you can see them and what prescriptions you can take. God help us all.
God Bless all cancer fighters, survivors, caretakers and their families.
Monday, August 30, 2010
How do people do it?
Another week starts today and I can’t help but wonder how us everyday “working janes and joes” that have cancer deal with it financially. Personally I won’t lie, it has crippled my family. I can’t work, least not what I was trained to do all my life and (not yet). I go to our wonderful (cough) government for help,, more specifically disability and I’m told sure we’ll help just wait 5 months. I guess they are hoping I die in that time, they didn’t wait to take my money from my first job. My family has helped my enormously and I may never be able to repay them. Don’t get me wrong I’m not feeling guilty or anything, I just know for me its been a bit stressful not being to provide for my family. (and yes we have gone through my 401k, emergency funds and savings). I just wonder how everyone else deals with it? I thought there were people in this country that helped when you had hard times and what I’m finding is that if you worked honestly all your life the attitude is “oh well good luck with that!” Because most of the agencies private and government won’t help unless you are literally “on the street”. If you were a hard working blue or white collar worker your basically on your own. Sorry there I go ranting again =p
God Bless all cancer fighters, survivors, caretakers and their families.
God Bless all cancer fighters, survivors, caretakers and their families.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Learning how NOT to work
Wow, I had a blast yesterday! I own 2 acres of land and since I was diagnosed with lung cancer I haven't really been well enough to maintain it. Well yesterday I just couldn't take it anymore. I put gas in my riding lawn mower, got my coveralls on and cleaned out the weeds so to speak. I had to wear an asbestos mask with my O2 hose going under it. I'm sure I sucked down some dust ( I live in the high desert). I just had to clean up my property it looked awful. I had told my family if working is going to kill me then so be it. It is driving me crazy doing next to nothing. Anyway today my ankles are the size of softballs (ouch). Seems my body has decided to retain water. So now the family is all mad at me for working. Oh well, I'm happy =p. Of course my body isn't and its letting me know. I guess I'm going to have to slow down, I've been trying to retrain my lungs but I think yesterday I went a bit to far. So now I have to learn not to work heheh. Maybe I can find a job that keeps my mind busy and not my body. Time to put my feet up!
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Little off subject
Last couple of days have been fun. My son-in-law, his friend and myself installed a new A/C unit for my house. Its great! Makes breathing much easier to do. I live in the mountains at about 4k' and its very dry here. So breathing becomes a challenge.
Been watching some TV and I've noticed the usual "that politician sucks more than I do commercials". I'm 53 and in my lifetime I have payed attention to politics since I was 18. I have always voted for the person that I thought would do the job right. This time though I'm probably going to vote for an independent. I'm tired of watching Democrats and Republicans ruin this country further in the name of "We are right".
They both have agendas of their own that have nothing to do with what the people want. Both parties in my opinion have lost touch with the people of America. Last election Obama said "Its time for change". Yes its time for change alright, its time America woke up and voted all incumbents out!
Ahh well I don't want to waste to much on that subject, just wanted to vent a little.
On another note, I don't understand people much anymore. Seems to me that with lung cancer being the #1 killer out of all the cancers, we'd be spending more money on a cure right? Oh no, thats right I forgot, society thinks that if you have lung cancer you asked for it because you smoked right?
Wrong! Alot of the people with lung cancer have never smoked in their life! Personally I did smoke, I smoked for 27 years. So what? First of all if smoking is that dam bad for you and society doesn't like smoking then why the hell do we make it? I'll tell you why, MONEY! Its easier to vilify me than to try to shut down a tobacco company. Why, we would put people out of work if we shut down tobacco companies! My goodness what would they do for a living? Its easier to call me stupid for smoking in the first place than to close a tobacco company! Yeah right, smokers have paid more money for cancer research then anyone else in the nation. Not only that but I have my own health insurance. Thank God, because our wonderful society would rather let me just die. I brought it on myself right? Lets not mention that while serving my country in the Navy I was exposed to asbestos. Or how about when I worked for a government shipyard and I was exposed to asbestos? It doesn't matter that when I worked for the federal government as a maintenance worker for 20 some odd years that every day I was exposed to asbestos. Nope that doesn't matter all.
I feel sorry for our country, not only have we turned into hypocrites, but now we're poking our faces in everyone else's business in the world like we know whats best for them...what a joke.
Been watching some TV and I've noticed the usual "that politician sucks more than I do commercials". I'm 53 and in my lifetime I have payed attention to politics since I was 18. I have always voted for the person that I thought would do the job right. This time though I'm probably going to vote for an independent. I'm tired of watching Democrats and Republicans ruin this country further in the name of "We are right".
They both have agendas of their own that have nothing to do with what the people want. Both parties in my opinion have lost touch with the people of America. Last election Obama said "Its time for change". Yes its time for change alright, its time America woke up and voted all incumbents out!
Ahh well I don't want to waste to much on that subject, just wanted to vent a little.
On another note, I don't understand people much anymore. Seems to me that with lung cancer being the #1 killer out of all the cancers, we'd be spending more money on a cure right? Oh no, thats right I forgot, society thinks that if you have lung cancer you asked for it because you smoked right?
Wrong! Alot of the people with lung cancer have never smoked in their life! Personally I did smoke, I smoked for 27 years. So what? First of all if smoking is that dam bad for you and society doesn't like smoking then why the hell do we make it? I'll tell you why, MONEY! Its easier to vilify me than to try to shut down a tobacco company. Why, we would put people out of work if we shut down tobacco companies! My goodness what would they do for a living? Its easier to call me stupid for smoking in the first place than to close a tobacco company! Yeah right, smokers have paid more money for cancer research then anyone else in the nation. Not only that but I have my own health insurance. Thank God, because our wonderful society would rather let me just die. I brought it on myself right? Lets not mention that while serving my country in the Navy I was exposed to asbestos. Or how about when I worked for a government shipyard and I was exposed to asbestos? It doesn't matter that when I worked for the federal government as a maintenance worker for 20 some odd years that every day I was exposed to asbestos. Nope that doesn't matter all.
I feel sorry for our country, not only have we turned into hypocrites, but now we're poking our faces in everyone else's business in the world like we know whats best for them...what a joke.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Learning chemo rules the hard way
Ok, I like spicy foods, no I love spicy foods. I have all my life. But since I started doing chemo I have a problem with spicy foods. A huge problem. And the bad thing is that since I have been eating spicy foods all my life its kind of a hard habit to break. If you have been to a "real" Mexican restaurant then you know that on the table where you sit are condiments usually consisting of salt, pepper, mild sauce, hot sauce and also a clear plastic bottle of tiny little yellow peppers (banana peppers). Typically I will eat 5 or 6 peppers before my food gets there, then another 10 or so along with my food. Also I love jalapenos, I eat them typically with everything. Now grant you there is price to pay for eating these wonderfully delicious peppers. I won't go into detail but I will say that when you "disperse" these peppers it normally feels like a 5 alarm fire coming out your ass. Now before chemo I was able to handle that. But since I started chemo the "pain" is far far beyond a 5 alarm fire. Now its more like a nuclear bomb is coming out of my ass after it explodes! The pain is so bad, I scream...I sweat...I swear...I pray...I dam near pass out, literally. Last night I had enchiladas, and my son knowing I love those hot carrots you can get, gets me a bag full. Like a dummy I eat the whole bag. Today I spent mostly on the toilet in agony and I do mean agony. So if you have started chemo and take the drugs Taxol and Carboplatin and you like spicy foods... DON'T EAT THEM! It will dam near kill you or at a minimum it will make you wish you were dead. I have had to tell my whole family to remind me not to eat spicy, its not worth the pain.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Dealing with life and cancer
Since I have been diagnosed with lung cancer, I have noticed that life is ALOT more stressful than before. You would think “well Donnie your dying from lung cancer, I would be stressed to!” But thats not the case at all. Most if not all of our stress ( my families’) comes from having to deal with people who are supposed to be making this crisis easier for me.
For example, since May I have flown out of Palm Springs airport directly to Chicago, but in June American Airlines stopped the non stop flight from Palm Springs. The new flight plan involved a layover at Dallas for 1 hour, barely enough time to change planes if the gate was in another terminal.
So now we fly out of John Wayne airport non stop to Chicago, but, we have had our problems there also.
American airlines has a “Special Needs” hotline you can call to let them know if your handicap and what your needs are. I called them 3 weeks before my flight to let them know I had an Oxygen Concentrator. The rep from AA was great, told me if my concentrator was approved for flight, asked me what my volume of O2 was, (2ml) then he told me exactly how many batteries I would need for flight (typically 150% battery life for the flight time). SO if the flight was say 3 hours I would need 5 hours battery time. We figured my flight time would be roughly 4 hours so I would need 6 hours battery life. My batteries last about 3-4 hours each so I had 4 when I got to the airport, thats about 12 hours battery life.
Well imagine my surprise when the ticket lady says I’m sorry you don’t have enough batteries…
Not only that but she also informs me that I need 12 batteries! Believe you me I was about ready to go postal on this lady, thank God my wife was there.
They delayed us for 1.5 hours, we got there with 3 hours to spare to make the flight. The whole issue was over a sentence in the airlines printed “Dr.s slip”. It asks on one line are you going to use the concentrator in pulse mode or continuous mode? (pulse mode only gives O2 when you inhale so it saves battery life). I use it in pulse mode. And that was noted accordingly, now the next says “Will you need to continuously use the concentrator while taxiing, takeoff, landing, taxiing to the gate etc. My Dr. put yes. Well the ticket lady says to me that means your using it in continuous mode, so you’ll need 12 batteries.
I’m trying to explain to this college educated person that the sentence is merely saying I will need to use my concentrator continuously, but in pulse mode not continuous mode. She disagreed and then basically told me and my wife to get out of the way she had other people to tend to.
I have to tell you it took all the patience I had not to reach across the counter and strangle this lady. My wife believe it or not had to calm me down, I was livid.
Finally after 1.5 hours a manager come up and she although at first didn’t agree with me, finally agreed that the statement is misleading and that the paper needs to be rewrote. So we finally get to get on the plane.
What kills me if everyone seems to think that I am heading out on vacation, I threatened the manager with a lawsuit, told her I am heading to CTCA to get chemo for my lung cancer, if I miss this appointment because of your airlines I will sue! I need chemo every 3 weeks, I have been doing this since May and everytime I fly its another problem with the airlines!
What really gets me is I go through all the trouble to jump through the hoops and such and still because the right hand does not know or care what the left hand has done I find myself in these predicaments.
Now I travel alone, I’m well enough that I don’t need the wife to come with me, (basically I can’t afford to fly her with me), so I’m praying that God grant me patience or you may be hearing in the news that man with lung cancer goes nutty in airport!
I’m smiling really I am, anyway this was just ONE of the things that drives me crazy when dealing with people. Now I have a true sense of how handicap people are treated in life. I want to add I am truly, deeply sorry for anyone in my life that I may have given a hard time not realizing they were handicapped.
God Bless all cancer fighters, caretakers, survivors, and their families!
For example, since May I have flown out of Palm Springs airport directly to Chicago, but in June American Airlines stopped the non stop flight from Palm Springs. The new flight plan involved a layover at Dallas for 1 hour, barely enough time to change planes if the gate was in another terminal.
So now we fly out of John Wayne airport non stop to Chicago, but, we have had our problems there also.
American airlines has a “Special Needs” hotline you can call to let them know if your handicap and what your needs are. I called them 3 weeks before my flight to let them know I had an Oxygen Concentrator. The rep from AA was great, told me if my concentrator was approved for flight, asked me what my volume of O2 was, (2ml) then he told me exactly how many batteries I would need for flight (typically 150% battery life for the flight time). SO if the flight was say 3 hours I would need 5 hours battery time. We figured my flight time would be roughly 4 hours so I would need 6 hours battery life. My batteries last about 3-4 hours each so I had 4 when I got to the airport, thats about 12 hours battery life.
Well imagine my surprise when the ticket lady says I’m sorry you don’t have enough batteries…
Not only that but she also informs me that I need 12 batteries! Believe you me I was about ready to go postal on this lady, thank God my wife was there.
They delayed us for 1.5 hours, we got there with 3 hours to spare to make the flight. The whole issue was over a sentence in the airlines printed “Dr.s slip”. It asks on one line are you going to use the concentrator in pulse mode or continuous mode? (pulse mode only gives O2 when you inhale so it saves battery life). I use it in pulse mode. And that was noted accordingly, now the next says “Will you need to continuously use the concentrator while taxiing, takeoff, landing, taxiing to the gate etc. My Dr. put yes. Well the ticket lady says to me that means your using it in continuous mode, so you’ll need 12 batteries.
I’m trying to explain to this college educated person that the sentence is merely saying I will need to use my concentrator continuously, but in pulse mode not continuous mode. She disagreed and then basically told me and my wife to get out of the way she had other people to tend to.
I have to tell you it took all the patience I had not to reach across the counter and strangle this lady. My wife believe it or not had to calm me down, I was livid.
Finally after 1.5 hours a manager come up and she although at first didn’t agree with me, finally agreed that the statement is misleading and that the paper needs to be rewrote. So we finally get to get on the plane.
What kills me if everyone seems to think that I am heading out on vacation, I threatened the manager with a lawsuit, told her I am heading to CTCA to get chemo for my lung cancer, if I miss this appointment because of your airlines I will sue! I need chemo every 3 weeks, I have been doing this since May and everytime I fly its another problem with the airlines!
What really gets me is I go through all the trouble to jump through the hoops and such and still because the right hand does not know or care what the left hand has done I find myself in these predicaments.
Now I travel alone, I’m well enough that I don’t need the wife to come with me, (basically I can’t afford to fly her with me), so I’m praying that God grant me patience or you may be hearing in the news that man with lung cancer goes nutty in airport!
I’m smiling really I am, anyway this was just ONE of the things that drives me crazy when dealing with people. Now I have a true sense of how handicap people are treated in life. I want to add I am truly, deeply sorry for anyone in my life that I may have given a hard time not realizing they were handicapped.
God Bless all cancer fighters, caretakers, survivors, and their families!
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Results from first checkup scans
Hi everyone, well talked to my Oncologist today about where I stand since chemo was started. Here are the results…
Tomography of the chest:
The spiculated mass obstructing the branch of the lower right lobe bronchus is significantly smaller compared to 5/1/10. This mass is approximately 3.8×2.5cm smaller compared to 5×5.5cm previously. There are also smaller scattered nodules in both upper and lower lobes, these to are significantly smaller. There is peribronchial consolidation involving the posterior aspect of the left upper lobe and also the lower lobes especially the right suspicious for peribronchial tumor infiltration. These also have improved. There are enlarged lobes in the mediastinum along the paratracheal area extending to the precarina, subcarina, pulmonary window, lateral to the aortic arch and both hilar areas. They also have improved.
Impression: Improvement of multiple masses in both lungs and lymphadenopathy in the mediastinum compared to 5/1/10.
No significant pleural effusion is seen, Axillary areas are normal.
Tomography of the pelvis and abdomen:
No abnormal mass, Liver and spleen are normal, Pancreas is normal, both adrenal glands are normal, Kidneys are functioning with no abnormal mass or hydronephrosis.
MR Brain with and without contrast:
No evidence of acute intracranial pathology. NM Bone scan Whole Body:
No evidence of metastatic disease within the skeletal system. Healing right 5th and 6th rib fractures. PET CT Base of skull to mid thigh:
No comparison available, pelvis shows no significant hypermetabolic mass. Inguinal are normal.
Impression: Hypermetabolic mass lesion in the left lower lobe consistent with malignancy. There are multiple patchy areas of slight increased metabolic activity in both upper and lower lobes. No other significant hypermetabolic mass is seen. Ok, so when my Oncologist told me this and then saw my blank face he put it in language I could better understand lol.
Apparently all the cancer in my body has shrunk. I do however still have a bit of debris left over from the pneumonia that is still lodged in my lower lungs. It will take time for my lungs to kick that crud out.
The lumps that I had on my neck are gone! The chemo just eradicated them. The tumor on my left lung has shrunk considerably. The scattered nodules throughout both lungs have shrunk significantly. The rest of my body is free from any cancer. It hasn’t spread!
Some people say there is no God, but I say to them, I’m not a church going person, I do believe in God and I do pray to him. And to be honest, since I learned I have cancer I’ve prayed alot more. And you know what, 3 months ago I couldn’t walk, talk, barely could breath and quite honestly I almost died from pneumonia. Now here I am 3 months later, I can walk (not far mind you but I’m working on that) I can talk without coughing every 5 seconds, ( I still cough but not near as bad or as often), and I can breath much better than I was. Now you can say oh well that’s the chemo doing its work. But I say if your mind isn’t right, all the drugs in the world won’t cure you. And my faith in God is what gets my mind right.
After the interview I had a hard time not breaking down while I tried to thank the young man that saved my life. I couldn’t express the words. How do you thank someone that saved you from cancer, and has given you your life back?
Anyway we are off to celebrate! (in moderation of course!)
God Bless all cancer fighters, survivors, caretakers and their families!
And God Bless CTCA!
PS: Zion decided to shut off all the street lights as I walked by =p GLOWING =p
Above is what I posted on my other blog at blogforacure.com.
I just wanted to add a few thoughts, First of all I wanted to say that the Cancer Treatment Centers of America are awesome. If you have discovered that you have cancer you need to go here. These people really do help!
I can't say enough about them, they treat you like family, they hug you, love you you and try their best to cure you. They help you with anything you need, they are Godsent.
I'd like to add more but I have to rest, had my 4th chemo today.
Tomography of the chest:
The spiculated mass obstructing the branch of the lower right lobe bronchus is significantly smaller compared to 5/1/10. This mass is approximately 3.8×2.5cm smaller compared to 5×5.5cm previously. There are also smaller scattered nodules in both upper and lower lobes, these to are significantly smaller. There is peribronchial consolidation involving the posterior aspect of the left upper lobe and also the lower lobes especially the right suspicious for peribronchial tumor infiltration. These also have improved. There are enlarged lobes in the mediastinum along the paratracheal area extending to the precarina, subcarina, pulmonary window, lateral to the aortic arch and both hilar areas. They also have improved.
Impression: Improvement of multiple masses in both lungs and lymphadenopathy in the mediastinum compared to 5/1/10.
No significant pleural effusion is seen, Axillary areas are normal.
Tomography of the pelvis and abdomen:
No abnormal mass, Liver and spleen are normal, Pancreas is normal, both adrenal glands are normal, Kidneys are functioning with no abnormal mass or hydronephrosis.
MR Brain with and without contrast:
No evidence of acute intracranial pathology. NM Bone scan Whole Body:
No evidence of metastatic disease within the skeletal system. Healing right 5th and 6th rib fractures. PET CT Base of skull to mid thigh:
No comparison available, pelvis shows no significant hypermetabolic mass. Inguinal are normal.
Impression: Hypermetabolic mass lesion in the left lower lobe consistent with malignancy. There are multiple patchy areas of slight increased metabolic activity in both upper and lower lobes. No other significant hypermetabolic mass is seen. Ok, so when my Oncologist told me this and then saw my blank face he put it in language I could better understand lol.
Apparently all the cancer in my body has shrunk. I do however still have a bit of debris left over from the pneumonia that is still lodged in my lower lungs. It will take time for my lungs to kick that crud out.
The lumps that I had on my neck are gone! The chemo just eradicated them. The tumor on my left lung has shrunk considerably. The scattered nodules throughout both lungs have shrunk significantly. The rest of my body is free from any cancer. It hasn’t spread!
Some people say there is no God, but I say to them, I’m not a church going person, I do believe in God and I do pray to him. And to be honest, since I learned I have cancer I’ve prayed alot more. And you know what, 3 months ago I couldn’t walk, talk, barely could breath and quite honestly I almost died from pneumonia. Now here I am 3 months later, I can walk (not far mind you but I’m working on that) I can talk without coughing every 5 seconds, ( I still cough but not near as bad or as often), and I can breath much better than I was. Now you can say oh well that’s the chemo doing its work. But I say if your mind isn’t right, all the drugs in the world won’t cure you. And my faith in God is what gets my mind right.
After the interview I had a hard time not breaking down while I tried to thank the young man that saved my life. I couldn’t express the words. How do you thank someone that saved you from cancer, and has given you your life back?
Anyway we are off to celebrate! (in moderation of course!)
God Bless all cancer fighters, survivors, caretakers and their families!
And God Bless CTCA!
PS: Zion decided to shut off all the street lights as I walked by =p GLOWING =p
Above is what I posted on my other blog at blogforacure.com.
I just wanted to add a few thoughts, First of all I wanted to say that the Cancer Treatment Centers of America are awesome. If you have discovered that you have cancer you need to go here. These people really do help!
I can't say enough about them, they treat you like family, they hug you, love you you and try their best to cure you. They help you with anything you need, they are Godsent.
I'd like to add more but I have to rest, had my 4th chemo today.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Chemo #4
Well I'll be flying out to Zion this Monday. This will not only be my 4th chemo but also I get all my scans to check how well the chemo is working. This is the first progress check since I started chemo. I'm pretty optimistic, I think the news will be good mostly because overall I feel much better than when this all started back in May. We shall see.
On the other hand, I applied for disability, and believe it or not I got approved! Problem is they won't start paying me benefits until next December... I've been on the phone all morning trying to find out why, what a joke.
I talked to one guy, well I should say he talked OVER me. He wouldn't let me ask any questions he just droned on about appeals, and the rules blah blah blah. Now I am on hold so far for 45 minutes trying to find out some info. Called a lawyer they can't help because I have already been approved. I got to talk to a lady from our local
SS office here in Hemet only to be disconnected so now I am "Hurrying up and waiting".
Well we'll see how this all turns out, maybe I should change my name to something more Latino...
On the other hand, I applied for disability, and believe it or not I got approved! Problem is they won't start paying me benefits until next December... I've been on the phone all morning trying to find out why, what a joke.
I talked to one guy, well I should say he talked OVER me. He wouldn't let me ask any questions he just droned on about appeals, and the rules blah blah blah. Now I am on hold so far for 45 minutes trying to find out some info. Called a lawyer they can't help because I have already been approved. I got to talk to a lady from our local
SS office here in Hemet only to be disconnected so now I am "Hurrying up and waiting".
Well we'll see how this all turns out, maybe I should change my name to something more Latino...
Thursday, July 22, 2010
First Entry
Hi, my name is Don, I was diagnosed with ST 4 lung cancer in May 2010. I was given 6 months to live.
Since that time life has been interesting to say the least. I typically blog at, dojoven.blogforacure.com/weblog,
but I have decided to use this blog as sort of a venting blog where i can vent some frustrations I have with life in general. More to come later so stay tuned!
Since that time life has been interesting to say the least. I typically blog at, dojoven.blogforacure.com/weblog,
but I have decided to use this blog as sort of a venting blog where i can vent some frustrations I have with life in general. More to come later so stay tuned!
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“Can’t we have some choices besides “sucks”?? Just because we have cancer doesn’t meant we want to sound like low life rednecks. Having cancer is bad enough.”
Posted on October 19, 2010 at 11:52:56 PM by susan (unverified)
I’m sorry susan to say this but I take a bit of offense at being called a “low life redneck”.
The logo to this site has always been “Cancer Sucks”, I’m sorry if its not politically correct for you, but then that begs the question? Why would you blog on a site you don’t like?
God Bless.
Ignorance SUCKS
Being judgmental SUCKS
Getting banned from anything Jill…SUCKS
see how useful this word is? I am now going out to the front porch to chew sunflower seeds and look at the broke down truck in the yard.
Love Yall
Mac
Fun to Vent?
I was raised in the South. And it was many years ago, I guess. No self respecting person (especially a woman!) would wear cuss words on their clothes!! Yes - I see that all the time at clinic for chemo. One man even wears a black shirt with white letters stating FU*& Cancer. Unbelieveable but true. To me --- that is the ultimate example of letting this disease beat you. It has stolen even your dignity. Look? Even in this e-mail he is known as the man with cuss words on his shirt. No thanks. And thankfully my son felt the same way. His chemo tee shirt said Livestrong and another one said Survivor. Apparently most people feel differently.
Good luck to you,
Susan
May God have mercy on you Susan Williams Tucker, I’d be hard pressed to. For those of us that don’t know what I’m venting about check out Jill’s post for a vote, also check out Blogforacure’s facebook page and look for Susan’s comments.
Posted on October 20, 2010 at 12:10:51 PM by Donnie (
Donnie you were my very first supporter and I love you dearly. BUT please my friend stress is our enemy and let no one piss you off least of all whats her face…there you see I have forgotten her name already.
Much love to you and your family and of course our very dear friend Jill, whom without, none of us would have met.
Dani xx
Thank you for this post. You put into words what I could not. I woke up this morning upset about this, trying to think of how to voice my thoughts.
I was annoyed, but not offended by her objections to Cancer Sucks, which she voiced when Jill took a poll on FB a while back. If you don’t like that kind of language, you have a perfect right to say so. However, you do NOT have a right to attack a group of good, loving, generous people who are nearly always willing to agree to disagree about things in order to work toward the greater goal of supporting each other through very, very difficult times. We are not hurting anyone with this slogan. We are helping many, many people. We are not wrong here. If you don’t like the slogan, don’t buy the tee shirt.
Susan revealed on FB in response to Jill’s Cancer Sucks poll that she lost her son to cancer 2 years ago. While we may not agree with her that “Cancer is Merely Highly Unpleasant,” we can pray for her and her family.
Peace,
Kathy
Don Venice October 19 at 9:57pm
Susan now that my temper has flared I’d like to be a bit more sensible, have you even bothered to read the blogs? Do you have cancer? Have you ever had cancer? If so then what the hell are you about? “Dignified” blogs against cancer? Are you serious? Cancer is shit, its despicable, it destroys lives, it destroys children, it destroys families, it destroys LIFE, How in the hell can you call us undignified? Are you kidding me? And you think our blog is fun? If you were in my face I would slap you. You have no idea what your talking about even if (which despite how mad I am at you I wouldn’t wish it on you) had cancer ever in your life. I suggest you read the blogs before you judge us undignified. Then have the courtesy to acknowledge me or any of the others on Blogforacure.com
Susan Williams Tucker October 20 at 6:30am Report
I do have cancer and I lost my 25 year old son to leukemia in September of 2008. Have a nice day.
Don Venice October 20 at 9:15am
Susan I will have a nice day, but please before you go and judge someone or something you know nothing about I suggest you do some research, read our blogs, see what we are about. I apologize to you for my reaction to your comments, in my eyes you attacked what has become a family for me, unjustly and uncalled for. For that I am sorry, but please I don’t want you to turn away mad, please take the time to read the blogs, you may not like our logo, but I’m sure you’ll like us. God Bless you in whatever you do. I to like many others on our blog have lost loved ones to this horrible disease. We do not “trivialize” cancer, its killing all of us on Blogforacure in one form or another. I will pray for your son and you.
Thats where we have left it, hopefully she does read out blog and see what we are about.
God Bless
Susan Williams Tucker October 20 at 10:40am Report
I have read the blogs. You may be surprised to learn that I have actually made a friend through Blog For a Cure and we support each other through Facebook and e-mails.
I was raised in the South. And it was many years ago, I guess. No self respecting person (especially a woman!) would wear cuss words on their clothes! Yes – I see that all the time at clinic for chemo. One man even wears a black shirt with white letters stating FU*& Cancer. Unbelieveable but true. To me—- that is the ultimate example of letting this disease beat you. It has stolen even your dignity. Look? Even in this e-mail he is known as the man with cuss words on his shirt. No thanks. And thankfully my son felt the same way. His chemo tee shirt said Livestrong and another one said Survivor. Apparently most people feel differently.
Good luck to you,
Susan
I decided not to respond any further. Apparently Susan and I come from 2 different upbringings. I was taught “All is fair in love and war” I am at war with cancer, I will do, say, feel, whatever I need to to beat it. I don’t have time for “dignified, fair, politically correct”, battles.
So Susan good luck with your fight and may God be with you.
I started to speak back to her yesterday in the middle of the ‘vote’ blog, then erased it, not wanting to feed into her bitterness. But last night I couldn’t bite my tongue(fingers?).
After I called her that not nice name I felt bad and posted my apology to everyone here. Imagine my suprise this afternoon, seeing what I started?
Amen to all of us. Don’t mess with my family!